Friday, May 23, 2008

Hahaha check out this hilarious THE ONION article!!

Oh man, this is really funny

"Whether you're a football fan or not, I'm sure you found yourself caught up in the hype this past winter with the success of the New Jersey Giants," said Sen. Paul Sarlo, D-Bergen. "I emphasize the New Jersey Giants."

Made-up sounding senator name: check
Hilarious premise that only slightly diverges from reality: check

And though the Giants tell the world they're from New York, Garden State senators said their come-from-behind attitude represented more of a Jersey mentality.

Sarlo said they resembled "gutsy New Jerseyans" and "what we are all about here in New Jersey."

Perfect execution of a stereotype (people from New Jersey are delusional and obnoxious): check

The ceremony enlivened the usually reserved Senate, especially when Codey grabbed a football and unleashed a perfect pass across the Senate chamber to Sen. Nicholas Scutari, D-Union.

One more made up name that sounds like some Italian guy who would live in New Jersey: check
Ridiculous, un-newsworthy ending to a totally un-newsworthy story that no self respecting journalist would ever consider even writing: check

Hehehe, I fucking love the Onion.

Wait, that wasn't in The Onion?

Fuck me.

5 comments:

Jarrett said...

No gay sex/fart jokes with lines like "...their come-from-behind attitude represented more of a Jersey mentality." and "gutsy New Jerseyans"?

C'mon, eriz. Those are softballs.

Tonus said...

People from Jersey ARE delusional and obnoxious. How can they not be, living and working so close to New York City?

Chris W said...

what a d-berg

eriz said...

jarrett, you wanna know my summer league softball OPS so far this season?

like .750 and that's counting slow dribblers to the shortstop that turn into errors as hits

seriously, I suck at softball

eriz said...

also, gay sex jokes are soooooo 2007