Joe Morgan Is America's Preeminent Baseball Color Commentator

During tonight's Mets/Phillies game, Joe had this to offer re: a video of Jose Reyes nearly sustaining an injury the night before when his head collided with Chase Utley's knee during an attempted steal:

"You see, he slides headfirst, which is the most dangerous way to slide because all kinds of things can happen."

1. Sliding feet first is probably less dangerous, but still puts you at risk for a plethora of potential injuries. "All kinds of things" can happen to your lower body just as easily as they can to your upper body. It's just the fragility of your head and hands that make going headfirst the riskier option.

2. I think Joe means more, rather than most, dangerous. Unless you count the "spread eagle flop," which hasn't been attempted in a game by anyone since Cappy "No Nuts" Williams in 1934, there are only two ways to slide.

I know that second point involves placing an awfully high level of scrutiny on someone as dumb as Joe, but how else was I going to get a dick joke into the post?

Quick Peter King Update

Thanks to reader Erik for alerting me to the fact that King is always writing ridiculous bullshit, even during the offseason. Neither of these items from last Sunday's column really requires a lot of analysis. Just soak them in.

I think we need to let Matt Leinart live his life and not freak out when photos show up of him in a hot tub with four bikini-clad girls. Tell me something: What's wrong with a very eligible bachelor hanging out with attractive girls (apparently very much of age) in a hot tub some night early in the offseason? I heard a TV person call the photos "disturbing.'' Why is it bad for Leinart to be photographed with four pretty girls in a hot tub, doing nothing but smiling for the camera?

I haven't seen the picture. I bet not everyone's hands are visible, though. Dick joke.

Now, I guess it's not the best image to have Leinart, in another photo, delivering a beer to a girl in one of those college funnel-type apparatuses, but again, tell me what there is to be outraged about? Is there proof that any of them are 17?

Well, no, I guess not. The ol' "But officer, she told me she was probably 18" defense. Peter King, you are a creep. I think it's worth pointing out that with his loose-living ways and seemingly friendly, down-to-Earth, good ol' boy personality, Leinart has a lot in common with a young Brett Favre. No wonder King is rushing to his defense.

Had a moving movie experience the other day at an IMAX theater in New York. I saw U2 3D, the three-dimensional film of a U2 concert in Buenos Aires in 2006. If you like U2, and you're within an hour of a 3-D theater somewhere in the world and the movie is still playing, you simply have to go. For $16 (or whatever it costs where you see it), it's the closest thing -- damn close, really -- to actually being in the middle of a pulsating crowd with Bono wailing out, Where the Streets Have No Name, with your leg bouncing up and down. Incredible. Bono's in your lap. The bouncing crowd, jumping up and down, is all around you.

In Erik's words, Peter is really "sexing it up" here. Personally, I'd rather Bono not be in my lap.