time for my weekly happy, positive, upbeat post

ive decided to make it a beginning-of-the-week tradition to make one post about a piece of journalism that doesnt suck. see my celebration of how dumb horse racing is from last tuesday. now, im no fan of all of jeff pearlman's work. the guy has definitely written a terrible article or two in his time. but that doesnt mean i cant appreciate good writing by the guy when i see it. this week id like to throw out a couple of fantastic snippets from his in-depth barry bonds pseudo-biography "love me, hate me: barry bonds and the making of an anti-hero." the book's real title should be "how we know beyond a shadow of a doubt that barry bonds is not just a steroid user, but also an absolutely ginormous asshole (even for an asshole of a professional athlete)."

i mean, this general subject is all old news. bonds did steroids. bonds is a jerk. we know this to be true. and furthermore, many of history's greatest athletes have been jerks; it's not like bonds is blazing a trail here. but the book manages to stay extremely interesting throughout by documenting literally hundreds of incidents, from bonds' spoiled childhood all the way up through the 2005 season, that are jaw droppingly funny/sad in their exposition of what kind of man he is in everyday situations. many just defy the imagination. you have to evaluate bonds on a whole new level of d-bag after reading this book. he makes rasheed wallace, bill romanowski, shea hillenbrand, etc. look like normal down-to-earth guys. thats the real beauty of the book; explaining what a messed up dude barry is in social situations. if you want an in-depth look at bonds' "alleged" steroid use, read "game of shadows" (although "love me, hate me" does cover it reasonably well). but if you want to get a full picture of what kind of a fucking weirdo and totally messed up person bonds is, which is more interesting in a lot of ways, this is your book right here. im about 3/4 of the way done (i'm making this post before finishing because it's monday) and two particular sentences have stood out. id like to share these with you.

1. from page 234. pertains to the title of this blog:

Jay Mariotti, the Chicago Sun Times star columnist, went so far as to shush anyone with the audacity to question Bonds's authenticity. "The whispers have been out there about Bonds, as they've been about any hitter who flirts with history," he wrote. "but any innuendo should stop at once."

oh jay. i would love to get a number on how many times since you wrote that (during bonds' historic 2001 season) you've complained about steroids in baseball and cited barry as the prime offender. not that columnists are never ever allowed to change their mind about something... but come on. it's jay were talking about here. im sure he just originally defended barry to piss people off. imagine if barry played for the cubs or white sox. what would jay have said about him then?

2. from page 225. pearlman doesnt give a citation for this one, but i hope to god it's true. this is from a section of the book about how bonds, in the author's words, "struggled to cope with his blackness."

Whereas (other) black players filled the San Francisco clubhouse with the beats of Tupac, Nas, Missy Elliot and Jay-Z, bonds's four favorite performers are Barbra Streisand, Kenny G., Michael Bolton, and Celine Dion.

oh my god.... please please please let me somehow find out that this is true. holy crap. this is the best and most entertaining detail i've heard about an athlete's personal life since i found out gilbert arenas' favorite movie was "kingpin."