Monday, July 27, 2009

Might as well Beat the Hell out of this Joke

Rachel Nichols with a fascinating update (current as of 3 PM EST Monday)!

Brett Favre continues to wrestle with a decision on whether to come out of retirement, agent Bus Cook told ESPN's Rachel Nichols on Monday.

I think you mean "wrassle" with a decision. Also, if there's one person in professional sports who deserves to be attacked by an even angrier swarm of bees than Brett Favre, it's Bus Cook.

Favre told The Associated Press earlier this month that he'll give the Minnesota Vikings an answer on whether he'll play by the July 30 start of training camp.

Does anyone actually take this guy at his word anymore? How the fuck could you? How could you watch what he's done in the press over the course of the past, say, three years, and believe a single thing he says? Preaching to the choir, I know.

At issue for Favre is whether he's really up to the mental and physical requirements of a long season in which he'll turn 40 years old.

Also at issue are the number of happy endings he can negotiate out of Peter King and company.

The quarterback's friends and family say they are leaving this decision solely up to him and will be supportive no matter which way he goes.

I wish just one of them would crack him a good one right across the face and shout "YOU'RE A HORRIBLE PERSON. GET OVER YOURSELF AND EITHER PLAY OR DON'T. DECIDE RIGHT THIS SECOND. NOW. NOW NOW NOW." /slapslapslapslapslap

"AND DON'T YOU EVER FUCKING TALK TO THE MEDIA AGAIN."

In the meantime Favre is poking some fun at his own indecisiveness in a new advertisement for Sears that will run in September. Cook told ESPN that Favre shot the ad last Monday.

God help us all. I'd rather hear "saved by zero" incessantly for five more months.

Rachel Nichols is a reporter for ESPN.

Go have her report on something, then.

7 comments:

Anonymous said...

Does Fire Jay Mariotti write about people writing about Brett Favre more than people write about Brett Favre? Is this very comment that is focused writing about people writing about people writing about Brett Favre one of the many vapid self-jerg off comments that reflects more on the commenter than on the substance of the comment?

Jack M said...

Anon,

That was so meta that I just went meta in my pants.

pnoles said...

lolz

dan-bob said...

If misspelling "jerk-off" was a nod to our family-friendly readers, we appreciate the effort!

If it isn't, then get a new keyboard.

Bengoodfella said...

I have $100 that says that anonymous commenter is Jeff MacGregor.

(waiting for someone to understand what I am talking about and agree with me).

Tonus said...

Every time I see Rachel Nichols, I keep waiting for Austin Powers to show up and start poking her mole with a small branch.

Jarrett said...

There should be a post about the anonymous comment.