Saturday, July 10, 2010

Just Because I Miss 'Em

My small amount of presence here on FireJay in recent months (years) is primarily attributable to the fact that I have had little-to-no time to blog it up. Truth be told, it's wedding and graduation party season, and I've got only so much time to myself, most of which is spent doing actuarial assessments and studying for exams. Which I guess, to the blogging community, makes me a huge nerd. Which, i guess, to the non-blogging community makes me some sort of sub-human creature, perhaps a cross between a ferret and a sea-slug, with comically large reading glasses.

Last night, I was talking with a close friend of mine, Dan (not the -bob variety), and he asked me why I don't post anymore. I told him that my reasoning behind my COMPLETE absence instead of very sparse presence is because I refuse to post things just to feel the need to defend myself against other people (read: person) (read: read: Chris W.) who post on this (read: blog) website (blog). As I've stated, I'm a firm believer of the FireJay guys being on the same team, and not tearing each other down. Without that, I might as well write elsewhere (I didn't).

Anyway, the reason you were all treated to that bit of hypocrisy on my part is because, well, frankly, I've been a little bored for a few minutes here and there, and I actually found myself reading Fire Joe Morgan archives, and chuckling stupidly to myself reading them. I know it's customary to make "what the hell is 'Fire Joe Morgan' " jokes around here, but truth be told, that IS where we got the idea, right? And let's be honest, that site did have pretty amazing content, even if ZOM G THOSE GUYS RLY HATE THE WHTIE SOXSSCSDXXXX AND ECKSETEIN!!!

So for better or for worse, I'm bringing back old memories with this one. Like it or not. We're gonna do a Joe Morgan Chat

Joe Morgan: As usual, there are a lot of omissions and a lot of players who are not happy with not making the all-star team. I can understand their frustration. It also happened to me on a couple of occasions. One thing to remember, when I was playing, there were 25 players on the roster and now there is 34. You have much better chance of making it now than before.

Hey Kevin Youkilis and Jered Weaver, Joe can totally understand what you're going through.

Only back in Joe's day, there were 9 fewer players on the team, so, ya guys can't really be THAT good.

Matt (Jacksonville): Joe, what is the problem with the Cubs? They have talent, but they can't seem to consistently put it together.

It has been over a year and a half since Fire Joe Morgan posted something. Matt (Jacksonville) still thinks this is funny.

Joe Morgan: The Cubs have had this problem for the last few years.

They were the best team in the world in 2008, which certainly falls under the last "few" years regardless of your definition of "few", but I guess that wasn't consistent enough.

It seems they can't get the right pieces to match.

What in the world does this sentence mean? Though if Jim Hendry really thought he was managing a jigsaw puzzle instead of a baseball franchise, that would explain a lot of things.

For a while they hit well but didn't score. Now they're pitching better but not hitting. They have not been able to perform at the high level it takes to win the Central division.

Matt: Hey Joe, what's wrong with the Cubs?

Joe: Well, for starters, they're really lacking in the "performance" department.

I think they've made some mistakes as far as evaluating some talent. put it mildly.....

In the long term that hurts you because a lot of the players there performing and you have some players getting paid a lot and not performing. It can drive a wedge between teammates.

Nary a mention of RamRam and his .268 OBP or the fact that Derrek Lee isn't outslugging Jeff Baker, who is having a terrible season. And for the record, Tyler Colvin has been batting cleanup for the Cubs recently, so I don't think he's really worried about higher paid players overshadowing him.

David Waddle (Park Hills, Ky): Do you agree that Joey Votto was robbed? First in HR, 3rd in B.A, and 5th in Ribbies. If you are choosing based on First-Half performance, which the manager SHOULD be...I'm glad he's not an umpire! He would have never made it into professional ball.

This topic has definitely been beaten to death, and the world's consensus is: "Yes, absolutely."

Joe Morgan: I don't think there is such a thing as robbed. I think there is such a thing as being overlooked.

That's a contrast! Let's boil those words down to their meaning, in context.

I don't think there is such a thing as [not getting put on the All-Star team when you really deserved to be]. I think there is a such thing as [not getting put on the All-Star team when you really deserved to be].

First of all, I'm the biggest Joey Votto fan, because I'm a Reds fan. I've watched him grow into one of the best hitters in the NL.

No one cares.

There are two ways of looking at this. First of all, the fans had a chance to vote him in and they didn't. Secondly, the players had a chance to vote him in and they didn't. So, how can you blame Charlie Manuel?

Easy. The fans voted in one 1B. The players voted in another 1B. Charlie Manuel had 100% jurisdiction over the final 9 roster slots, and he selected another first baseman not named Joey Votto. This is not a difficult concept to understand.

I would say that Adrian Gonzalez' numbers are not as good as Votto's. Howard has more RBI than he does and Howard has led his team to two World Series the last two years. He's been the MVP and ROY of the league.

Really? The fact that Howard won the 2006 MVP entitles him to play in the 2010 All-Star Game?

No, no, wait, really, beyond that. Why the fuck does Howard winning the Rookie of the Year award in 2005 entitle him to be on the All-Star team instead of Joey Votto???

1) How did Chris Coghlan get snubbed this bad?
2) Why isn't Omar Vizquel and his copious Gold Gloves in the game instead of Adrian Beltre?

If that doesn't make him an all-star, then I don't know what does.

Idiots that constantly overrate Ryan Howard?

It seems all of a sudden, we're only concerned with the first three months of the season. What's an all-star? The three months leading into the game or the full body of work. In any case, I think he should be on the all-star team. We'll leave it at that.

Joe Morgan's 2010 AL All-Star starters

C: Jason Varitek
1B: Jim Thome
2B: Roberto Alomar
SS: Derek Jeter (just kidding, it's Dave Concepcion)
3B: Alex Rodriguez
LF: Gary Sheffield
CF: Grady Sizemore
RF: Ichiro (won the ROY in 2001)

It's about the full body of work, people.

Pete (San Francisco): Who are your AL and NL MVP's at the half-way-point of the season? I know we still have half a season to play, but if you were forced to choose someone from each league to be an MVP at this point in the season, who would it be?

Joe Morgan: In the AL, I would pick Robinson Cano.

Not a terrible choice.

His team has the best record in the league

Couldn't be less relevant even if it dove into a vat full of radioactive irrelevance.

and he's their leader,

Did....did Derek Jeter pass away recently? I'm amazed that wasn't in the news.

The NL is a little toughter. I would have to give it to 2-3 guys: David Wright, Troy Glaus, Pujols.

Sounds good, pretty reasonable, go on.....




Wait a minute.


Troy Glaus, the first baseman hitting .257/.362/.448.

Troy Glaus, the guy who isn't on an All-Star team, despite the fact that there are 4 NL All-Star first basemen.

Most. Valuable. Fucking. Player.

Then I'd have to give Scott Rolen and Joey Votto a nod. I don't think it's as clear cut in the NL as it is in the AL.


Tito (Brooklyn): Joe, Ryan Howard said the other day that he hasn't found a consistent groove at the plate yet. What do you think he needs to do to be more consistent?

Tito (Brooklyn) is still amused by this as well....

Joe Morgan: I think he has been a consistent hitter this year. His batting average has been over .290 most of the year. He's struck out fewer times and he's still hitting home runs, though he might not be hitting as many as he wants.

So far, pretty good reply to the JoeBait.....

It seems like people want to down play what he's accomplished. That's amazing to me. This is a guy who has averaged 40+ home runs and driven in well over 100 every year. He's won an MVP and led his team to the World Series the last two years. A first baseman's job is to produce runs. I don't understand why he doesn't get the credit for being the run producer that he is.

Joe's demands are simple. Will SOMEONE in the fucking world take notice of Ryan Howard already???? I, for one, am sick of how overlooked (or is it "robbed?") that Ryan Howard is getting!!!

KC (ATL): It looks like playoff baseball in Philly against the Braves. Can the Braves hold them off over the long haul?

Joe Morgan: The Braves can win, the Phillies can win and the Mets can win.

So, it could be....

1) The Braves
2) The Phillies
3) The Mets

Who else is in the mix?

The Mets are in the mix as well.

4) The Mets

They'll get Beltran back. Watching Santan last night tells me that he's going to pitch well the rest of the season.

Good, yeah, The Mets definitely have a shot. Who else do we need to watch out for?

Don't dismiss the Mets.

5) The Mets

Anyone else?

And if the Phillies can get all of their players back healthy, like Utley and Rollins can get back to his game, they can win.

6) The Phillies

Whew...okay...that has to be all, right?

And the Braves can win.

7) The Braves

It's a 7-horse race in the NL East folks, can't wait to see how it plays out!

It's too early to decide.

8) Too Early to Decide might make a late charge as well.....

Rob (NY): The AL Central is pretty much up for grabs at this point. Who do you think comes away with that division?

Joe Morgan: For a long time I thought it was going to be the Twins. They just have a knack for winning and knowing how to play the game and not making mistakes.

Brennan Boesch and Carlos Guillen are oblivious to the rules of baseball. Also, I nearly jizzed my pants when he said the Twins have a knack for not making mistakes, but was mega-sad when I then discovered that the Twins actually have the fewest errors in the majors.

You have to look at the fact that Joe Mauer has only four home runs. His run production is down and therefore that's going to effect the Twins more than people realize down the stretch.

So Joe Mauer's production through the first week of July is going to "effect" the way the Twins are playing in September.


I really think it's going to depend on who makes the right deal at the deadline. If Detroit, Minnesota, Chicago were, to say, get Cliff Lee, then that's the team I would favor.

If, one, of those, teams, would, have go,tten them I would, have to agree.

Rob (NY): Hey joe lets get a LeBron prediction from a fellow beloved ohio ballplayer

Joe Morgan: First of all, I am a HUGE NBA fan.

I think your credibility here is SEVERELY hurt by the fact that you probably also consider yourself a HUGE MLB fan.

But I will say this: I am personally turned off by all of this. In my opinion, if LeBron goes and plays in Miami and Wade and Bosh, then he's throwing his teammates in Cleveland under the bus as if it were their fault that they didn't win in the NBA last year.

LeBron James, 2010 Playoffs: 29.1/9.3/7.6. Yeah, he really sucked it up in Game 5 against Boston, but it's VERY safe to say that Cleveland lost for non-Lebron reasons.

I've always talked with Bill Russell, the greatest champion in team sports,


and he always said it was his duty to make his teammates better. If LeBron goes to Miami, he's saying it wasn't his fault, it was someone else's. I would not want to have that opinion of LeBron.

Then don't.

That didn't make much sense at all, now did it?

If Kobe, LeBron, Wade, Bosh and Dwight Howard all went together, they'd probably win a championship. So, if you can orchestrate who you can play with at the right time, anybody can win a championship.

It sounds like Joe knows EXACTLY as much about the NBA as MLB.

Ryan (PA): Am I the only person who would prefer players from their team not make the All-Star game? I would rather have them have a couple days rest, especially the pitchers from the team I route for.

Joe Morgan: I think you're the only one that thinks that way.

Ouch. Ryan (PA), you just got JoePwned

Players will tell you that when they do not make the all-star team, they prefer the days off. But guess what? If they were selected to the team, they would happily go. Any player, who's a good player and wants to be the best that he can be, wants to play in the all-star game. The all-star game solidifies your place as one of the best players in the game.

Like Omar Infante and Evan Meek.

I wouldn't want to be on a team where players didn't want to be their best.

.....thanks for that.

In this new age it seems that we don't take the all-star game as seriously as we did in the past.

All-Star Game "in the past": Meant nothing, exhibition.
All-Star Game "in this new age": Determines home-field advantage in the World Series, a big deal for any contending team.

[insert sarcastic joke pointing out how clearly wrong Joe is about this]

Blech. That took too long. But I've had fun.


Eddie said...

Yay pnoles is back!!

Biggus Rickus said...

I like that in an answer about whether or not the Braves can win he discussed reasons their rivals can win. But he called Glaus an MVP candidate, so I guess it's a wash or maybe even a Braves advantage in crazy-talk.

John Foley said...

The "consistent" thing is still funny. It's incumbent on all chatters to keep using it. One reason is that Joe still says it. Another, even better reason is that he obviously doesn't know that everyone has called him on it in blogs. Just shows how completely out of touch he is.

Any player, who's a good player and wants to be the best that he can be, wants to play in the all-star game.

Uh-oh, Joe. Don't let your boyfriend Barry Bonds hear you say that.

Tonus said...

Not to rag on Bill Russell, who is one of the best players in NBA history... but didn't he play most of his career on a team with something like 38 future hall of famers?

As for making your team better, lets see how Cleveland does this upcoming season and I guess we can judge that. What is the early line on their odds to win 60+ games again next year?

Anonymous said...

Agree with John Foley -- I feel like the writers here are probably the only people out there who DONT think joe-baiting is funny. And it seems doubly weird to me that guys who piggy-backed FJM would then mock former FJM followers. Hey, Pot, it's me, the kettle -- Guess what?

Larry B said...

I still think Joebaiting is funny.

-another writer on this blog

pnoles said...

Yeah, I guess that kinda came off wrong. I wasn't trying to criticize the questioners for JoeBaiting, I was just amused at FireJoe's legacy considering that people are still doing this long after they've stopped existing. I'm pretty neutral on JoeBaiting.

Chris W said...

What the fuck is anonymous talking about?

Adam said...


So Joe thinks that Joey Votto could be the NL MVP (probably is), but does not deserve to be an All-Star.

He is also completely overlooking (or should I say robbing???) the fact that Charlie Manuel is to blame because he picked is own guy over the better player.

You see Joe, the problem with the All-Star selections is: 1. The fans are stupid. 2. The players are stupid. 3. The managers are stupid.

John Foley said...

You're forgetting one thing: Joe Morgan is always in favor of the black player being picked over the white one.

Miserable Bastard said...

I missed JoeChat. Thanks for this pnoles.

Adam said...

Ha, good point. No wonder he couldn't come up with an NL MVP none of those he mentioned were black.