Monday, August 17, 2009

Too Soon to Start Posting About Football? Clearly Not. Too Soon to Trivialize Hurricane Katrina's Impact? Probably

Pat Forde has a column out which focuses on NCAA football's 40 all-time greatest villains. It's interesting at parts; Brian Bosworth is #1, which is appropriate considering he was a once-in-a-generation overrated loudmouth roid-using dickwad. Whistle-blowing Phil Fulmer is on the list, as are Ty Willingham (for singlehandedly destroying two very proud programs) and Nick Saban (for being a complete waste of skin who should be shot into deep space). There are also a lot of guys on there who weren't bad people, just guys who broke other teams' hearts with great plays like Matt Davison and Lindsay Scott. Blah blah blah. Then there's this:

38. Kellen Winslow -- Miami tight end, 2001-03

Hated by:
Military veterans.

Claim to Infamy: After contentious game against Tennessee Nov. 8, 2003, two years after 9/11, Winslow declared himself a soldier. Declared college football war. Declared that the Volunteers were out to kill him, so he in turn was out to kill them. Did not declare for military service, not then or ever.

I love that "I'M A FUCKING SOLDIER" soundbite, but yeah, I see where Pat is coming from. Mr. Motorcycle Accident here was trivializing something that's very serious and important, and really can't be compared to anything in sports. So then, anyone want to explain why Chad's article also contains this?

13. Hurricane Katrina -- Act of God, 2005

Hated by:

Claim to Infamy: Massive storm and subsequent flooding turned promising Green Wave season into disaster. Playing away from home all season, Tulane went 2-9 and still hasn't recovered. After winning 18 games from 2002-04, Green Wave have only won 12 games in the four seasons since the storm.

Right. Yeah. Let's discuss cognitive dissonance, and try to figure out why Chad doesn't experience it. Kellen Winslow talking about being a soldier was bad because being a soldier is really a whole lot more serious and (in certain ways) significant than being an athlete. And in that same way, identifying Hurricane Katrina as a "sports villain" is bad because the impact of Katrina was really a whole lot more serious and (in pretty much every way) significant than just ruining an NCAA football season.

Boy, that 9/11 really was a bummer, wasn't it? Totally messed up the end of the 2001 MLB regular season. What a villain!

I'm not actually trying to make a 9/11 joke, just trying to put Pat's idiocy into perspective.

Hmmmm. Should probably just stop writing now.

/stops digging metaphorical hole

/backs away slowly

/sprints to waiting car, peels out and accelerates away

/intentionally runs over Nick Saban


Elliot said...

What about the 1989 Loma Prieta earthquake. That evil spawn of Satan POSTPONED THE WORLD SERIES! DAMN YOU EARTHQUAKE!

...oh yeah, almost forgot to mention that there were a few dozen killed, thousands injured and millions in property damages, but most importantly IT POSTPONED THE WORLD SERIES!

See you in hell Loma Prieta earthquake.

Jarrett said...

Hey - The Bos may have been a once-in-a-generation overrated loudmouth roid-using dickwad, but he could call an XFL game on UPN with class.

Anonymous said...


Tonus said...

Guys, none of this matters. ESPN reports that Brett Favre IS BACK!!! Fuck yeah, the NFL is saved!

Larry B said...

Eh, Chad, Pat, whatever.

Chris W said...

i'm glad you finally admit that Tyrone Willingham and Tyrone Willingham alone destroyed Notre Dame, both athletically and academically.

dan-bob said...

look, to me, the key point is this: ty kind of sucked for 2 years, so he got canned.

larry b, 9.12.2007

Ty Willingham (for singlehandedly destroying two very proud programs)

larry b, today

fire larry b, fire ty, fire charlie, fire everybody, notre dame is going to go 9-3 this year and i'll be mad.

start the yearly late-summer notre dame vitriol!

dan-bob said...

but that's old news. isn't there some more new and important actual news that we should be discussing?

Larry B said...

Boy, D-B, am I allowed to change my opinion (on something that can take time to evaluate) 23 months later? Especially in light of what Ty did to Washington, and how bad ND really was in 2007 and 2008? Am I allowed to do that? Is that OK with you? Can I get your permission for that? Hey, at least after Ty left, ND got decidedly NASTIER. FULL OF NAST.

Chris W said...

whatever, cakes

Mr. Samurai said...

Totally millering this thread, but considering the lack of Brett Favre coverage I must.

New theory: Brett Favre saw ESPN bust a nut all over Eagles' camp. Like a jealous ex-girlfriend, he knew that he wanted that good ESPN stuff all over his own face. Contract signed. Sal Paolotino finds a flight from Philadelphia to Minneapolis, to go fellate.

Tonus said...

Any word from Peter King? I'm getting the shakes, here.

Larry B said...

Wait what happened with Brett Favre

Andy said...

I love how Forde openly and blatantly called Notre Dame a racist institution for firing Willingham and not Fat Charlie, but now admits that he was a rotten coach that totally destroyed the program.

Martin said...

Another thread hijack...

The new Ombudsman piece is up....and it's just gawd awful. As someone else said, it reads like soemthing put together by an ESPN intern under instruction by the PR/Marketing departments, then slapped Ohlmeyer's name on it. I think that ESPN couldn't get LeAnn out of there fast enough so they could put in an objective" mouthpiece.

Chris W said...

Nah, Andy, it was a backhanded acknowledgement of TW's failure, wherein Forde underplayed TW's failure, implying that ND fans were being irrational re: TW's failure since TW only had 3 years, etc etc etc etc