Monday, June 11, 2012

Ironic irony, Stanley Cup edition

As the Kings wrapped up their title-clinching victory over New Jersey tonight, NBC's Mike Emrick made sure to throw some nonsense into the moment by trying to sound smart and clever (roughly paraphrased):

The Cup will make its rounds with the members of the team this summer, as every player will have some time with it in the offseason.  Ironically, it was the Devils who started that practice back in 1995!

Chris W is way better with the English language than I am, so I usually GChat him when I come across misuse of irony and ask him to concoct a way in which the situation in question could be modified to be made actually ironic.  I didn't even bother with this one, I don't even know if it's possible.  THE GAUNTLET IS SORT OF THROWN, CHRIS.  DO YOUR WORST IN THE COMMENTS.

As a freshly minted hockey fan, I can't say I have a lot of experience with a variety of play by play guys.  It's really just Emrick, the dudes from NBC's B/C/D teams (from earlier in the playoffs), and my favorite team's booth guys.  But to the extent that I can criticize him from my small sample size of time spent listening to his broadcasts, this is the problem with Emrick--he tries to sound smart and clever all the time, and he's neither.  Which is to say, he pretty much has the exactly same problem everyone who misidentifies/misuses irony has.

Also, one last time, why the hell not:

Nobody captures their identity better than Dustin Penner, their frustrating 6-foot-3 forward who's evolved into something of a whipping boy for the Kings faithful. One of the biggest guys on the team, Penner barely throws checks, much less punches. Every time he wades into the corner and goes through the motions of not hitting someone, you hear this chorus of pissed-off "COME ON, PENNER!" hisses coming from every direction. I always want him to do well, just because it's funny when he scores and the fans instantly flip that switch and pretend to be Penner fans again. But if you're trying to win the Cup? You need less Penners and more Ryane Clowe.

And sure, I'm the one who laughed uproariously at the idea of the Celtics making the NBA Finals, and then they almost did.  But 1) they didn't, 2) I blame Rose's ACL, and 3) I don't get paid to do this so neener neener neener and I hope Bill Simmons falls out of a blimp.


cs said...

9000 word column written by Bill Simmons' daughter coming soon!

Venezuelan Beaver Cheese said...

"You need less Penners and more Ryane Clowe."

"Penner," in this usage, is a countable noun, which means he should've used "fewer" rather than "less." Either "Ryane Clowe" is a non-countable noun or this writer didn't use parallel structure. Tsk tsk.

Chris W said...

If the Devils had started that practice as some sort of a voodoo curse to prevent any team who ever intended to do it from ever winning the Stanley Cup. However, little did they know--but we the audience knew--that the Kings never intended to do it, and thus the Devils, thinking the Kings intended to do it, played less intently in the NHL Championship Series secure in their perceived knowledge that fate was on their side allowing the Kings to win the Cup, whereupon, overcome with the emotional resonance of such a moment, themselves engaged in the same voodoo ritual which will--inevitably be their own downfall!


Alex said...

Regardless of the private day started in 1995, the Cup has traditionally stayed with the team during the summer for over 100 years and is filled with interesting stories.

Say it all together now: Needs more Penner!

Cups won by Clowe:0.
Penner: 2.