Wednesday, January 13, 2010

Scoop Jackson might be retarded

After the Ravens destruction of the of the Pats in Foxboro, most pundits generally agreed that it was stupid for Belichick to punt the ball from his own 42 on 4th & 2, when earlier in the season, he went for it in a similar situation against the Colts. Scoop Jackson decided to weigh in with an entirely different theory:

In New England's AFC Wild-Card game against Baltimore, Patriots coach Bill Belichick made a decision to begin the game that proved to be the difference. The question is: Why did he make that decision?

Broken down, we can understand that Belichick's decision after winning the coin toss to open the game to kick the ball to the Ravens can be directly linked to the the infamous fourth-and-2 call he made against the Indianapolis Colts.

I smell a gigantic leap in logic coming.

The breakdown:

• In that game against the Colts, the one thing that came from that call was the belief that Belichick didn't believe in his defense. He claimed that wasn't the case. But that perception still existed.

• For almost two months the Patriots have had to deal with that possible truth hanging over their team. There's been nothing Belichick could do leading up to the playoffs to counter the rumors. He was just waiting for the opportunity.

• Playoffs begin. Wild-Card game. An opportunity for Belichick to finally get this off his back.

On the 4th & 2 at the end of the first half, right?

• In a game at home against a team that is not known for being an offensive treat, Belichick figured it was safe. What better time to instill confidence in his defense and squash the lack of confidence rumors than to let his defense open up the game against the Ravens.

• Coin flip: Pats win. One play later: Pats lose.

Wow, you are (when it comes to writing about football) fucking retarded.

1. As a Ravens fan, I can tell you that they rarely score touchdowns on their first possessions.

2. They've never hit an 80+ yard touchdown on their first play from scrimmage.

3. Do you think that the Pats gave up that touchdown run because they got over-confident they got from Belichick electing to differ (something a lot of team do against the Ravens)? If so, you're stupid.

4. You do realize that Ravens were going to get the ball at some point in the game, right?

5. The game was far from over after Rice's touchdown, and you're really dumb.

• For the second time this season, Belichick made the wrong decision. This one cost him more than just a game.

Not really. Yes, his team was eliminated from the playoffs, but they certainly weren't going to get past San Diego, and now they're in a better position in the likely uncapped off-season than if they'd been 1 of the final 8 teams. So really, they didn't lose a whole lot, and you're just a terrible sports writer.

So you see how this all came about: How one decision eight weeks ago affected one that decided the Pats' season.

No one sees that because it's a completely idiotic line of reasoning.

Most people won't see it like that, but if you watch enough CSI, it'll make sense.

Detective Frank Tripp: Sir, this sports writer is just terrible. This whole article is a giant piece of shit.

Lieutenant Horatio Caine: (puts on sunglasses) Now there's a Scoop.



Elliot said...

Scoop just loves logical fallacies. Usually it's post hoc ergo proctor hoc (after the fact therefore because of it), but I think he's figured out a new one: pre hoc ergo proctor hoc.

Someone might want to explain the whole causality thing to Scoop.

Bill said...

Belichick defers every time he wins the toss. He likes the ball ti start the second half. He has been doing this for a long time.